


Becoming Virgil

by YouveGotAFiendInMe



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Emotional Turmoil, Eventual Prinxiety, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Highschool AU, Homophobia, Logan x Patton - Freeform, M/M, Prinxiety - Freeform, Roman x Virgil - Freeform, Slow Burn, Trans Virgil, Transphobia, coming of age story, deceit x remus - Freeform, declan x remus, dukeceit, logicality - Freeform, lots of feelings, remile - Freeform, remy x emile
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-03
Updated: 2019-11-05
Packaged: 2021-01-21 11:57:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21299090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YouveGotAFiendInMe/pseuds/YouveGotAFiendInMe
Summary: Virgil has spent the past fourteen years of his life as Alana Picani, but as he begins his freshman year of high school, he decides he can no longer hide who he is, and he takes the first steps towards Becoming Virgil.NSFW chapters will be clearly marked so you can skip over them if that isn't your thing, and other than the NSFW chapters, the rest of the fic will be decently clean save for maybe occasional making out.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Dr. Emile Picani/Sleep | Remy Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 34
Kudos: 176





	1. Chapter 1

"My name is Virgil Picani." Virgil spoke to his reflection for the sixth time that morning, this time voice strong and not shaking, "And I'm the hardest and toughest guy you'll ever meet."

"Alana Picani!" An exasperated voice cut Virgil from his thoughts, and he clapped his hands over his mouth as he screeched, the voice continuing on, "Young lady, your father is going to be late unless you get your ass down here _now_!"__

_ _Virgil flushed red as he tucked his hair into his beanie, regarding his reflection one more time with a soft, "You've got this, man." Before he grabbed his backpack and ran down the stairs, skipping several steps at a time in his haste to reach the first floor._ _

_ _His dads were in the kitchen, Remy looking slightly frustrated as Emile handed him a mug of coffee, which Virgil promptly snatched, taking a quick sip before handing it back to his dad, who was looking more exasperated by the second._ _

_ _"It's your first day of high school and you're going to be late." Remy chided Virgil, "Lana, you can't make this a habit."_ _

_ _Virgil struggled not to wince at how wrong his old name sounded to him, "I won't, I won't, I was just making sure I was prepared. Pens, pencils, notebook, hand saw, textbooks, chewing gum. I'm prepared."_ _

_ _"... Wait, what was that middle one?"_ _

_ _Emile kissed his husband on the cheek, "Thomas didn't have one for his art class to use, and he couldn't get out to the store last night, so I told him Alana would bring him ours." He explained._ _

_ _"... You two are actually going to kill me someday, you know that, right?" Remy asked as he leaned against the counter, sipping his coffee before he leaned in to give  
Emile a fast, parting kiss on the lips, "Now run along, you're going to be late, and while she maybe able to get away with it, I doubt they'll let the school guidance counselor off so easily."_ _

_ _Virgil stuck his tongue out at Remy, then zipped up his hoodie, "Come on, let's go already!"_ _

_ _Emile couldn't help it as he chuckled, "Alright, let me grab my bag."_ _

_ _Virgil dashed out to the car before Emile even got his bag, getting into the passenger side, anxiously picking at his cuticles as he took a steadying breath, speaking quietly even though he was the only one in the car, "I'm Virgil Picani, and no matter what anyone else says, I'm just as much of a guy as any of the guys at my school."_ _

_ _He could do this. The first day was the hardest after all, right? One day of introducing himself as Virgil, and the rest of the semester would be a breeze._ _

_ _\---_ _

_ _As it turned out, Virgil was wrong._ _

_ _He'd planned and hyped himself up to use his name and pronouns, but the moment he'd been called Alana, he'd shut his mouth and bit back any response, suddenly too afraid of the eyes on him to say anything, even as Remus gave him a questioning look, since Virgil had been over his plan with both Remus and Declan for weeks, but Virgil just gave a small shake of his head, and Remus frowned, nodding once in understanding._ _

_ _As he got to his Spanish class, he was already done with that day, but silently found a seat in back with Declan and Remus, silently resting his head on Remus's shoulder._ _

_ _"I'm still down to murder people if they misgender you." Remus reminded Virgil softly, "I know there's no Netflix in prison, but you and Declan would write me."_ _

_ _Declan didn't look up from his phone, "No I wouldn't."_ _

_ _"But prison would be so _boring_." Remus groaned, "What would I do without your endearing words filled with spite and your witty comebacks??"___ _

_ _ _ _"God, you're just as dramatic as your brother." Declan grumbled softly, biting back a grin with a small shake of his head, "I'd sneak a file in for you, but letters are too sentimental."_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _"But you _loooove_ me." Remus giggled, "You and Virgil both."___ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _Virgil felt himself smile a little, and sighed softly, "Even if you make us work for it."_ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _"Love is work, and you're both so emotionally constipated it's like talking to brick walls." Remus sighed dramatically, "I guess I'll have to find a source of affection somewhere else."_ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _Declan looked up from his phone, face blank as he watched Remus, "You're well aware that we're high schoolers, right? In two years we'll be driving, probably have jobs?"_ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _"I'm gay, therefore, I can't drive." Remus said proudly, "So you'll have to take me everywhere!"_ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _"Ditto to that, dude." Virgil smirked, "Looks like you're stuck with us."_ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _Declan rolled his eyes with a shake of his head, "We're _all_ gay. What makes you think I can drive better than you two?"___ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _"He's got the attention span of a goldfish, and I have anxiety." Virgil teased._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _"And what have I got?" Declan questioned._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _"Dumb bitch disease." Remus answered happily._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _All three burst into laughter, ignoring the way people stared as they entered the class, perfectly content in their little bubble designated just for them and their friendship with one another. They all quieted as Remus's brother entered, however, and Remus quirked a brow at Virgil, "_Ooh_, speaking of _gay_..."_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _"You're _not_ setting me up with your brother." Virgil shook his head, thankful as he saw Roman sit among his friends instead of joining Virgil, Remus, and Declan, "Just because his last two boyfriends were emo doesn't mean I'm the next logical choice. Why not toss Declan this one?"___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Remus gasped, obviously exaggerating as he wrapped his arms around Declan, "No. He's _mine_. All mine."___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _Declan flushed slightly, and Virgil aimed a teasing look at him, only resulting in a deeper flush and the baring of teeth in warning, which Virgil took with a roll of his eyes, settling back in his seat._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _"So what are we doing on Sunday?" Virgil changed the subject, "Because my dads are doing a date thing, and I don't want to get in the way."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _"We could destroy capitalism." Remus offered, "I can make us friendship bracelets for it!"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _"The way you did the week you decided to destroy gender?" Declan drawled, attention back on his phone now that Remus had released him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _"Gender is a scam and we all know it!" Remus objected._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _"Mhm, course, dear." Declan nodded along, "Whatever you say."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _The three boys quickly quieted as the teacher moved to the front of the class, and Virgil once again braced for a miserable hour of misgendering._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	2. Chapter 2

Lunch was next, and Virgil, disgusted by what was being offered in the lunch line, settled for a pre-packaged salad from the snack bar and a bottle of water, sitting with Remus and Declan who had brought things from home. They settled into their normal chatter, and once Remus finished eating, he stood behind Virgil, brushing out his elbow length hair with the hair brush he kept in his bag, braiding Virgil's hair happily.

"I wish my hair was soft like yours." He mused, "You don't even condition."

"Dude, I use whatever my dads buy. They happen to just land on 2-in-1 body wash and shampoo." Virgil laughed.

Remus made a noise, clearly horrified, "How the hell is your hair still attached to your scalp??"

"Not all of us keep an arsenal of hair care." Declan snickered, "Give him a break, it isn't his fault he has good hair."

"He doesn't even take care of it and somehow it's still better than I've ever gotten mine!" Remus whined, "This is peak bullshit."

"When I cut it, you can have it." Virgil offered.

"Careful, you never know what he'll do with it." Declan teased, "He might make a shrine to you and worship your hair."

"Oh please." Remus scoffed, "You two think so lowly of me."

Virgil couldn't help but roll his eyes, "It's because we _know_ you."

The table devolved into arguments, and Virgil only shut his mouth as he saw Roman approaching, and he nudged Remus, who looked up and grinned wide.

"Hey, big bro." Remus giggled, "How's life been since Spanish?"

"It's been… Rough." He admitted, "Is there any chance Patton, Logan, and I could sit here for the rest of lunch? There are no tables left."

"What about the football team's table?" Remus cocked his head to the side, and Roman winced.

"They started making fun of Patton for wearing a skirt to school today. He's upset about it, and told Logan and I to go ahead without him, but Logan and I aren't going to."

Virgil knew Remus and Declan were never going to agree unless Virgil did, knowing Virgil would suffer through more misgendering, so Virgil piped up with, "It's cool, bring them over."

Roman looked both relieved and thankful and left, returning with two guys their age, Patton, Virgil assumed, based on the skirt, who had tears in his eyes, and Logan, who despite looking composed for the most part, had moved to Patton's side protectively, gray eyes sharp and focused.

"This is my brother Remus and his friends." Roman said to his own friends as they sat, "This is Patton and Logan." He said to the others.

Patton gave a shy wave, and Logan simply nodded once, and Virgil yelped loudly as Remus began brushing his hair again, catching on a knot.

"Careful, you dipshit, you're going to rip my hair out!"

"Dollar for the swear jar." Declan mused.

"Fuck the swear jar." said Virgil.

Remus snickered, "These are my personal idiots." He motioned to Declan, who gave a short wave with two fingers.

"Declan." He said curtly.

"And _this_ little ray of potty mouthed sunshine is," Remus trailed off so Virgil could answer how he liked.

Through gritted teeth, he smiled, "Alana."

"Alana Picani?" Patton asked softly, remembering back to Spanish when role had been taken.

Virgil nodded once, tucking his hair into his beanie again once Remus wrapped up with his braiding, "Yeah."

"The counselor's daughter?" Logan piped up, a brow raised, "I always heard he had a daughter, I just didn't realize how drastically different you two are."

Virgil shrugged a shoulder, stabbing at his salad with his fork just for something to do, "I take more after my other dad."

"Definitely have his attitude." Declan mumbled, then yelped as Virgil stabbed his hand with his plastic fork.

"Easy there, Brutus." Remus teased, patting Virgil's other hand, "He needs his hands, you know. Stabbing is fun, but not a good idea."

"Shakespeare?" Logan asked, actually appearing surprised.

"What, Roman make me out to be some idiot?"

Roman glared at his brother, "You do that by yourself."

Declan whistled lowly, "Damn, Remus"

"Swear jar!" Remus whined.

"Don't bother." Patton giggled, "I tried with these two. Never saw a dime."

"The mere idea of Logan ever cursing is enough to make me feel weird." Virgil admitted.

"He doesn't look the type, but give it a week." Roman warned, "He's got the mouth of a sailor."

"Falsehood." Logan huffed, "I'm quite capable of not swearing."

"He owed over $200 by the time I gave up on the swear jar." Patton said, unable to hide a smile at the glare Logan directed at him.

"200 swear words isn't that bad." Virgil reasoned.

"We did it on a system of dimes. It was a week." Roman explained.

Logan couldn't help it as he flushed red, "It was the beginning of marching season, okay?"

And so lunch was spent that day with smiles and laughter, and there was an unspoken understanding among all of them that this would be a regular occurrence.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: predatory male behavior and sexism

Virgil had been dreading gym all day, and he realized he hated it more than he could have ever hoped to.

He'd ran from class to the unisex bathroom, locked the door, then changed as fast as humanly possible before he shoved his other clothes in his backpack, making a mad dash for the gym, only to barely make it on time. Immediately after, the gym teacher made him leave his hoodie and beanie on the bleachers, and he felt painfully exposed, but he refused to let himself cry, even as tears burned hot in his eyes. He put all of his anger, frustration, and sadness into running, since they had to do a warm up of a mile, his earbuds in as his feet pounded against the gym floor, well aware he was ahead of everyone else but not caring, only wanting to make the pit of darkness and emptiness at his core go away.

He reached the finish line first, and grabbed his water bottle, taking a swig as he tugged his earbuds out of his ears, ignoring Roman and his friends who had made it just under a minute after Virgil.

"Damn, Picani, not bad for a chick." one of Roman's friends smirked, and Virgil's skin crawled at how Roman's friend quite obviously looked him over.

"Apparently not bad for a dude, either, seeing as your dumb ass couldn't keep up." Virgil bit back.

"I'm just saying, girls are less capable of-"

Roman clapped a hand on his friend's shoulder, "Dude, shut up." He advised, "She kicked _all_ our asses. Accept the L and move on."

Roman's friend gaped, "I was complimenting her!"

Virgil scowled, "Might want to try harder next time."

"Well, I mean, would you rather I say you have a nice ass?"

The entire gym seemed to fall into silence, waiting for what Virgil would do, and he shrugged his shoulders, uncapping his water bottle before he aimed it at Roman's friend and squeezed, sending a spray over his entire face and chest. He then tossed the empty bottle at Roman's friend, dark eyes narrowed, a flicker of something dangerous in them.

"There, since you're so thirsty." He growled, "Talk about my ass again and I'll beat yours into the pavement."

Roman had a hand clapped over his mouth, body shaking with silent laughter, and finally, he couldn't contain it and burst out laughing at how horrified and frightened his friend appeared, "You _so_ deserved that!"

Virgil walked away, to the bleachers where his hoodie was, and he pulled it on, only slightly smirking as he heard the gym teacher say, "Taylor, why the hell are you soaked?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter, but the next one deals with a heavy topic, and it's really long, so let this hold you over for a little until I can get the next chapter finished and edited <3

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and Kudos are always appreciated!!


End file.
